Pained

I thought concealing the truth was best

Kept hidden in deep darkness was laid

Let those secrets never see light again

If I keep them all there

Then you would never have to hurt

For your or my sake

So why are things so complicated?

In your eyes I only see pain

You want me to bring them to light

But I’ve resolved to keep them out of sight

I do want to let you have your way

Yet don’t cause I can’t stand your tears

If you knew you’d hurt so much more

However would this actually hurt you

When I’ve already pained

Your heart so many times before?

Are You Really You?

Why can’t I move forward?

Can I never let go of you?

You are still a constant

On the tangents of my thoughts.

But why do you linger on?

Is it because of that indecision

So many years ago

That continues to haunt me

Those unresolved feelings

And emotions have come to rot

And decay in the empty wasteland

Of my bitter heart?

Or is it because that

I nursed those wistful feelings

For so many years and

When the chance came to

Reveal all those harbored secrets

I only discover that you’ve

Become someone that I don’t know?

Who are you now?

Where have your feet taken you?

Who are you anymore?

Are you really you?

Who is Belle?

You say you love me truely

But soon you will realize and find

That the love that I offer

Is cruel, hurtful and blind.

Yes, it’ll cause you to lose your mind.

You’ll feel it slowly unwind

And scatter into pieces

Like everyone else

Who ever touched me.

Despite the warnings that I’ve said

You still reach and call my name

In an endless refrain.

Do you know that it drives me insane?

Why do you continue to chase

In the name of my love?

Why continue to hurt yourself

Cause you won’t drop this game?

You call me your Belle

To your horrid, wretched Beast

When in reality I am the Beast

With only the appearance of Belle.

You were always Belle

Both inside your heart and out.

In only one way were you the Beast

And that was that you gave me

Your heart so unconditionally

With a vague hope that it’d be returned

Eventually, like in the movies.

But this is real life, not cinema

In the end, you’ll only be burned.

 

Cut Off

cut off.jpg

Staring at these messages

Reading your lines over

And over

And over again

Doesn’t make you hurt less

Doesn’t stop your steadily growing pain

Makes me feel more and more helpless

Can’t even give you a hug

Can’t even lend a shoulder

Cut off in-between

And I

Can’t do a thing

Yes

I can’t stop the pain from increasing

Just

Watch the love bleeding

Your

Lonely soul weeping

All I can do is offer these hollow words

On a silver platter

Across an illuminated screen

And hope that they mean something

When I really know

That they won’t change a thing

Yes, they can’t change anything

 

He’s on Top

She loved to make lists.

Her favorite one was

About things that she loved,

But could also harm her:

Vipers, scorpions, bears and sharks

Thorns, claws, talons and burrs

Tigers, tarantulas, wasps and hawks

Guns, swords, chemicals and liquor.

That’s where she placed him,

At the very top of the page.